The Silence That Screams: Are We Leaving Our Unlived Wounds to Children and Dogs?

The Silence That Screams: Are We Leaving Our Unlived Wounds to Children and Dogs?

Unlived wounds that we keep silent about become quiet alarms in our homes, and this is why dogs are the first to recognize them. What we often mistake for calmness is, in reality, trauma that is afraid of itself. If we do nothing, we will leave our children to face the consequences of our silence and our pretense that everything was fine.

The Illusion of Stability and the Denial of Pain

In my previous column, I wrote about how, in our attempt to protect ourselves from overwhelming pain, we left dogs to be the first to show the consequences of our silence. A comment recently appeared: “There was no panic or chaos. The dog had its routine.”

This sentence is a perfect example of how unlived wounds are created through denial. When collective trauma strikes so deeply, the easiest way to survive is to say that nothing happened. But this denial is not proof of stability; it is a symptom of a wound. No one wants to admit the world stopped, because that would mean admitting what that stoppage did to our internal systems.

A Dangerous Inheritance for Children and Dogs

Adults find ways to survive even when life collapses, but children and dogs do not have the mechanisms to store trauma in internal drawers. They will live out what we do not dare to acknowledge.

The sentence “The dog had a routine” is actually a sentence of fear. It speaks about a person who needed that routine as an anchor to endure an unbearable period. If we continue to close our eyes to who we became during the pandemic, we only close another circle of silence. Silence creates generations that carry the weight of their parents without knowing why.

Emotional Imprints: When Dogs Speak for Us

Dogs are already showing us the results of these unlived wounds. We see it in:

  • Severe separation anxiety

  • Increased reactivity

  • Panic when humans return to work

  • Inability to be separated for even five minutes

These are not „problem dogs.“ These are emotional imprints of human pain that was never fully processed. They speak through their behavior because we chose to remain silent.

 

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A disturbed dog as proof that unlived wounds speak through the behavior of pets, reflecting the owner's suppressed stress

The sentence “The dog had a routine” is often not proof of stability, but the deepest scream of fear hidden behind an appearance of normalcy.

 

Acknowledgment as the Path to Healing

We must not leave our children and dogs an inheritance of silence. The price of silence always comes; it just needs time. It is time to stop defending ourselves with „there was no panic.“

Acknowledging that it was hard and painful is not weakness. Acknowledgment is the only way to ensure that we do not pass our unlived wounds to our children and our dogs as an invisible inheritance. Truth, not silence, is what leads to stability.


At Sasha Riess, we understand that a dog’s peace is tied to the human’s honesty. Facing our unlived wounds is the only way to protect our pets and children, leading us all toward pureloveandharmony. Discover more about our holistic approach: Linktree Sasha Riess

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The Pain Trap: Is Your Routine Just a Mask?

The Pain Trap: Is Your Routine Just a Mask?

Many of us believe we are stable because we have maintained our daily habits, but very often that routine is nothing more than the pain trap we fall into in order to hide our unprocessed wounds. In my previous column, I spoke about how, in an attempt to protect ourselves from overwhelming pain, we allowed dogs to be the first to show the consequences of our silence.

Denial: How the Pain Trap Is Formed Through Unprocessed Wounds

A recent comment stated: “There was no panic or chaos. The dog had its routine.” This sentence is a perfect example of the very truth I was writing about. It is born when the memory of pain is too heavy to open. When social trauma strikes so deeply that the easiest way to survive is to say that nothing happened.

But this kind of denial is not proof of stability. It is proof of a wound. The pain trap is a survival mechanism where we minimize trauma because we cannot yet bear to confront it.

The Most Dangerous Pattern of Collective Psychology

The normalization of suppression is dangerous—not just for adults, but for children and dogs. They do not have mechanisms to lock everything away in inner drawers. They will live what we do not dare to admit. Dogs are already living the symptoms of silence; children will inherit them if we continue on this path.

[Image representing the contrast between outward routine and inner emotional weight]

Symptoms of Silence: What Dogs Tell Us About Our Pain

When we say „the dog had its routine,“ we are often speaking about our own need to maintain the illusion of normality. But dogs have already shown us what happens when emotions remain without a voice. We see it in:

  • Severe separation anxiety

  • Increased reactivity

  • Panic when owners return to work

These are not „problem dogs.“ These are emotional imprints of human pain that was never fully processed within the pain trap.

 

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A close-up of a human hand and a dog's paw symbolizing emotional connection and the transmission of stress through **the pain trap**

Our children and pets do not know how to hide what we are silent about.

 

Acknowledgment as the Path to Healing

If we do not speak about what happened, those who should not will speak instead: our children and our dogs. They speak through behavior, through the body, and through restlessness. We must not leave them an inheritance of a burden that belongs to us.

Acknowledging that it was hard and painful is not weakness. It is the only way to ensure we do not pass our own trauma on as an invisible inheritance. The pain trap only loses its power when we find the courage to speak the truth.


At Sasha Riess, we understand that a dog’s behavior is often a reflection of the human’s inner state. Breaking free from the pain trap is essential to achieving true pureloveandharmony. Start your journey of acknowledgment here: Linktree Sasha Riess

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